Do you ever feel like you don’t want to open up to new people? Maybe because you’re worried that they may judge you, or ridicule you? Most people have of course. But for some people, it’s much more than that. Some people have a condition called avoidant personality disorder, and for them, the idea of meeting new people doesn’t just make them a little uncomfortable. It’s a source of sheer terror. And that fear can actually seriously impair their ability to live a normal life.
So, what exactly is avoidant personality disorder? And how can it be treated?
What Is Avoidant Personality Disorder?
Avoidant personality disorder is a condition marked by an extreme fear of rejection or ridicule and a desire to avoid social interactions as a result. People with the condition are constantly afraid of being judged by those around them and are often very critical of themselves. As a result, they tend to avoid any situation where there will be people they don’t know.
Though they may want the same kind of emotional connections with others as everyone else, their fear that people won’t like them tends to make them avoid making the effort to make those kinds of connections. This fact often means that they have a hard time making friends or starting relationships.
Obviously, everyone worries about what others think of them from time to time. But for people with AvPD, that anxiety is closer to a phobia.
We aren’t sure what causes the condition, but emotional neglect or abuse during childhood often leads people to develop the condition. But many people with happy childhoods can suffer from it as well.
The symptoms of the condition are:
- Avoidance of social activities due to a fear of rejection.
- Extreme sensitivity to criticism.
- Feelings of worthlessness or self-criticism.
- A sense that other people will dislike you.
Usually, these symptoms develop in early childhood and continue into adulthood. As people with the condition age, they may grow more fearful of interactions with others. Often, people with the condition realize that they have more trouble with social interactions than others. And they usually want to do something to change that, but simply don’t know how.
This fact is often very tragic because they still feel loneliness like everyone else, but their condition prevents them from meeting new people. So, someone with the condition can experience a significantly lower quality of life.
Loneliness also has very real health effects. Persistent feelings of loneliness raise the levels of stress hormone in the body. Over time, these stress hormones can damage your cardiovascular system and even lead to heart attacks and strokes.
In addition, chronic loneliness often leads to substance abuse problems or even suicide. So AvPD is actually a very serious threat to your health and possibly even life. Luckily, there are a few things you can do to help manage it.
How Can You Manage It?
It would be great if AvPD were a condition that could be solved by medication. Unfortunately, this isn’t usually the case. Antidepressants can be useful in reducing the amount of anxiety or stress someone feels when in social settings, but it can’t fix the underlying problems that cause the condition.
Usually, talk therapy is more beneficial to a patient’s long-term health than medication. If you’re suffering from the condition, it can be a good idea to look for a therapist who specializes in personality disorders. They can help you examine the root of your anxiety and find ways to overcome it. And they can also help you learn coping mechanisms to help manage the anxiety you feel in social interactions.
AvPD is a lifelong condition and is usually formed in childhood, so people who suffer from it have adapted to a negative way of thinking for most of their lives. Overcoming those patterns of thinking isn’t really something that can be done quickly. It usually takes years of therapy.
The best solution for treating the condition is a combination of therapy and medication. But what’s important is that people who suffer from AvPD get some form of treatment. Without treatment, they can be forced to live their lives without the kind of emotional connections that our minds and bodies crave.
Humans are social creatures, and our brains are tuned to want companionship. People who spend too much time socially isolated don’t just suffer emotionally, but physically. Healthy relationships and connections are an important part of a healthy and productive life.
So, have you struggled with avoidance personality disorder? What’s it like? What treatment was effective for you? Let us know in the comments.
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